Jake,

How come you have not been writing on the site at all lately?

Answer:

My response may seem lame, but a circular or evasive answer would be unfair to my readers, for whom I am immensely thankful. Anabolic Stories’ content has stagnated because of a brutal case of writer’s block. As such, the columns that I have written in the past couple of weeks have not been posted. They are indicative of an immensely distracted mind.

That said, I expect to return to publishing articles in the near future. The mental obstruction will eventually fade and thoughts will become coherent pieces.

I will not thank you in advance for your understanding because I do not know if you understand my brain’s plight.

My response may seem pathetic, but a circular or evasive answer would be unfair to my readers, for whom I am immensely thankful. Anabolic Stories’ content has stagnated because of a brutal case of writer’s block. As such, the columns that I have written in the past couple of weeks have not been posted. They are indicative of an immensely distracted mind.

That said, I expect to return to publishing articles in the near future. The mental obstruction will eventually fade and thoughts will become coherent pieces.

I will not thank you in advance for your understanding because I do not know if you understand my brain’s plight. But, I hope you do.

1. “Thank God for IEDs.”
-Westboro Baptist Church

Members of this infamous church carry signs that display the message above at American soldiers’ funerals. In their fantasy world, a higher power kills soldiers to punish the masses for their sins, most notably, they argue, homosexuality. Someone should thump these brainwashed ignoramuses over the head their bibles. They spread hateful messages through the guise of religion. Many of these vermin are indoctrinated when children. Sadly, we can only observe and lambaste.

2. “Israeli apartheid, you ain’t fine, you ain’t got no alibi, you ugly.”
-Queers Against Israeli Apartheid (QuAIA) chanting at Toronto’s Gay Pride Parade

This cheer was not only painfully immature and out of place. Its message was, plainly, stupid. Labeling Israel as an apartheid state is unfair and incorrect. The nation is under constant threat and must employ some segregationist measures to ensure its survival. These precautions are not extreme. Palestinians are not routinely subjected to cavity searches and forced to strip. In reality, Hamas is the Palestinians’ governing party. The organization’s goal is Israel’s destruction. A brief viewing of their horrendous Mickey Mouse spin-offs in which they tell children to become martyrs is an adequate synopsis of Hamas’ goals. As such, regardless of one’s sexual orientation, calling for Israel to end its “apartheid ways” is idiotic.

3. Anarchy could work.
-The assumption of some G-20 protestors

No, it cannot. An anarchist state would encourage more idiots, like the Black Bloc thugs, to run wild. But, if you want more Madoffs, choose anarchy.

4. “She is a rubber-stamp hardcore leftist, and she is there not to enforce the Constitution but to reinterpret it for Obama.”
-Rush Limbaugh on pending American Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan

That is correct! And, the Democratic Party is actually a group of socialist aliens who plan to transform humans into baby eating dinosaurs and force LeBron James to sign with the Charlottte Bobcats.

5. “Did Michael Jackson die a Muslim?”
-Headline from The Nation Online

Attempting to identify a more useless talking point than the aforementioned headline would be difficult.

Jake, What do you think of the Leafs’ latest acquisitions of Colby Armstrong and Kris Versteeg? Will they help get the Maple Leafs into the playoffs?

Answer:

The two newest significant Toronto Maple Leafs’ players, Kris Versteeg and Colby Armstrong, should improve the club. The two add grit and modest scoring ability. Versteeg seems poised to develop into a 25-30 goal scorer after netting 20 goals in his 79-game sophomore season.

But, these acquisitions will not catapult the Leafs into meaningful contention. Sure, the combination of obtaining Versteeg and Armstrong, a (barring injury) full season with Dion Phaneuf, Phil Kessel, as well as the underrated penalty killer Fredrik Sjostrom in the line up, and the absence of Vesa Toskala will likely keep the team out of the Eastern Conference basement.

However, Brian Burke’s building model is unlikely to transform Toronto into an elite team, like the Chicago Blackhawks, Pittsburgh Penguins, and Washington Capitals. Frankly, the most judicious and effective construction model of the post-lockout era (and arguably pre-lockout age) is ranking among the National Hockey League’s worst squads, hence collecting top draft choices. It provides an organization with frontline talent on entry level contracts. As such, free agent signings and trade gains can compliment homegrown superstars.

The Leafs’ building strategy is radically different than the NHL norm. Whether it will be successful is uncertain. But, the chance of Burke’s plan ending the Buds’ Stanley Cup drought is low.

Alas, like countless noble pursuits, small groups use a social platform for red herrings. Indeed, political agendas appear in places at which they have no business.

Queers Against Israeli Apartheid’s presence at Toronto’s G.P.P. was certainly a case of group using an inappropriate arena to spread its message. While this corner believes that QuAIA’s arguments are harmful balderdash, the organization’s merits are, in this instance, irrelevant.

Alleged Israeli apartheid protesting and gay activism are mutually exclusive. But, due to public backlash and a supposed threat of losing city funding, the parade’s organizers allowed QuAIA to march. Freedom of speech and expression defeated commonsense.
And, as QuAIA strutted through downtown Toronto chanting “Israeli apartheid, you ain’t fine, you ain’t got no alibi, you ugly,” (How can one take a “political” voice seriously with that childish mantra?) the day’s meaning was, in those moments, non-existent.
A few Zionist and Jewish groups encouraged adherents to contest the anti-Israel message. Thankfully, their rallying calls were not answered in great numbers. A shouting match concerning Middle Eastern tensions would further distract the masses from G.P.P.’s vitality and palpable importance.

Toronto’s Pride Parade planning committee ought to increase the stringency of its participation criteria. Only individuals with relevant (to the event) material should be permitted to participate. If guidelines were clear, litigious civil rights activists would not have a reasonable freedom of speech and expression case against the G.P.P. disallowing QuAIA to partake in the proceedings. Additional distracters, like Queers Against Obama, would also lose potential advocacy stages.

Sadly, at this year’s parade in Toronto, the planners were bullied into diluting their display.

Roth man, I have heard through the grapevine that you’re into poetry and write some of your own. Can I see something that you have written?

Answer:

You are not the first person to request that I release some of my poetry. But, I have hitherto chosen not to publicly share my work. As such, the following poem is the first that I will reveal to the masses.

Sand Does Not Trap Rays

I have escaped civilization,
Wandering aimlessly through a pitch-black desert.
A gentle wind choreographs the hallowed floor.
A refreshing cold air has usurped the day’s excruciating heat.

Sand does not trap rays.

Humanity is nonexistent.
Peering up, down, side to side,
I only know the contents of my mind.
I can only feel the present.

When the darkness subsides, I will see again.
When the warmth returns, I will remove my shirt.
But now, I exist in chilly darkness.
Tomorrow is a mystery.

Sand does not trap rays.
Nothing lasts forever.

The stars and the moon are hidden.
Yet, I stand in utter darkness and light.
I am a nomad.
We are all nomadic.

I must accept change.
I am not in control.
I have only the power to interact,
The power of awareness.

Sand does not trap rays.
Nothing lasts forever.
We will all turn to sand.

-Jake Roth

Answer: Toy Story 3

The majority of animated movies are marketed to children. They are usually colorful, hyper, and have simple plot lines, which make them conducive to youngsters. However, if adults forego a nap while their children view these films, they may notice a plethora of social commentary and subtle themes. Finding Nemo, Wall-E, and A Bug’s Life come to mind as flicks which transcend the obvious.

However, Toy Story 3’s subtleties are most memorable. The film’s main human character, Andy, bequeaths his toys, for he has outgrown them and must “clean house” before leaving for college. We see an individual who must say good-bye to “objects” that were once (and still remain) the source of innocent happiness, but may soon become relics in his increasingly busy mind. He decides to put the toys in the attic. Alas, Andy’s mother mistakes them for trash. But, the toy protagonist, Woody, saves them and they find an interim home at the local daycare center. Their journey to escape this inferno of snotty youths is complex. In it, the viewer should observe unwavering friendship and society’s disregard for the past; obsoleteness surrounds us. This synopsis will remain vague, as I do not intend to spoil key plot details.

Toy Story 3 was especially meaningful to me because I recently graduated from high school. I will miss my teachers, friends, and the school’s faculty, like Andy may yearn for his toys. I am excited for the copious opportunities ahead, but do not want to leave the place that I considered home. Toy Story 3 reminded me of my life’s position, which led to plenty of reflection. It is thus both my favorite animated movie and one of the best motion pictures that I have seen.

In a democratic society, violent protests are not a means to gain sympathy for an opinion. To all the vandals and cop car burners: You are moronic thugs. Nobody is going to listen to your lines of reasoning, even if they are sound. Leave my city and play Russian Roulette or whatever you idiots do to amuse yourselves. If you die in your aimless “uprising,” you will have only yourselves to blame.

Mr. Roth, I have read that a restaurant in Arizona served lion meat. That’s despicable, isn’t it?

Answer:

If you are a meat eater, lion consumption should not be particularly deplorable. Your food is merely another life lost. But, meat eating animal activists, who might as well be prostitute nuns, may argue that lions are too adorable to consume.

Folks, these ridiculous cuteness and cuddliness arguments are red herrings. The real ethical “dilemma” is whether slaughtering a species with a nervous system is acceptable. Because we can live healthily without animal flesh, there need not be a conundrum. Killing is immoral.

Opponents may argue that we need meat to survive. This line of reasoning is poorly supported. A large portion of the scientific community now believes that a plant-based diet is superlative. Put simply, killing supporters’ arguments rely on insufficient evidence.

The nature of slaughter is irrelevant. Sure, a painless death is better than the alternative. However, murder is never humane…whether it involves, lions, tigers, bears, cows, monkeys, goats, sheep, ducks, chickens, golden retrievers, pigs, turkeys, fish, or other mobile species.

Do not allow the “this is why they’re here” or any of the ubiquitous unsound arguments to confuse you. The reality is indeed tautological.

Answer:

Here is the Anabolic Stories Notes synopsis of the latest Karate Kid:

Detroit’s brutal economy forces a boy named Dre and his mother to move to China. He arrives in his new location and falls in love with a girl to whom he has yet to speak. Alas, the local bully, who is also a kung fu wizard, beats him up in the playground. And, the young lady’s parents object to their relationship. He hates China. Dre undergoes months of kung fu training with his building’s superintendent and, in the end, defeats the thug in a tournament and charms his girl’s parents.

Amazingly, the film manages to exploit a poor economy, a single mother, star-crossed youth love, violence, fatal car crashes, and the emergence of an underdog. Indeed, the writers must have put The Pursuit of Happiness, Georgia Rules, Romeo and Juliet Erin Brockovich, Fly Away Home, and Rocky in a blender and hoped for a decent outcome. Frankly, the movie should make viewers want to “fly away home.”

But, its excessive use of clichés is not the flick’s most troubling aspect.

While standing up for oneself is a noble message, this principle is disturbingly portrayed. Dre’s mother applauds him as he pounds other children in a kung fu tournament. When the Detroit native breaks his leg, his coach and mom allow him to continue fighting.

What is the moral of The Karate Kid? You can beat someone up as long as you bow before doing so.

Councillors Stintz and Giambrone both agreed that face-to-face meetings amongst world leaders are necessary, but had different opinions on the issues of compensating businesses that the conference will negatively impact.

Click on the following links to hear the interviews:

http://www.anabolicstories.com/2010/06/adam-giambrone-toronto-city-councilor-and-ttc-chair-on-the-g-20-summit/ (Councillor Giambrone)

http://www.anabolicstories.com/2010/06/toronto-city-councillor-karen-stintz-on-the-g-20-summit/ (Councillor Stintz)